Flashbacks – What are they?
For anyone who has experienced sexual abuse, rape or any other traumatic event flashbacks can be a terrifying experience.
Flashbacks are a memory of a frightening or painful experience, which occurred either in the distant or recent past.
It tends not to be like an ordinary memory, but more a sudden and unexpected intrusion. Flashbacks can be experienced as a single slide from a slide show, a snapshot or photograph that flashes repeatedly or like a video clip. It can feel almost as real as when it originally happened and can also be as frightening.
Not everyone’s flashbacks are visual. Some take the form of words and phrases or sounds that were heard in the past. They can be accompanied by intense feelings e.g. sadness, anger, or physical sensations known as ‘body memories’, which may have been felt at the time of the original assault. Flashbacks can happen at any time, anywhere and often occur without warning. They can be triggered by, the time of year or day, something on the television, film, smells, a song or touch, absolutely anything. These can occur instantly or sometime later.
For ideas on how to cope visit our Help Centre
Let yourself know that what you are experiencing is a flashback and that this is a normal reaction to the abuse you experienced. It may be useful to look around you and take note of what is happening in the here and now. You may find it reassuring or grounding to carry a stone or something familiar and comforting in your pocket that you can stroke, hold or rub when a flashback occurs. Try to breathe from your diaphragm (put your hand just above your navel and breathe so your hand is pushed up and down.) This can help prevent a panic attack. If the flashback occurs whilst you are out and about try to get yourself to somewhere that you feel safe and secure. If you are wakened by a flashback, also known as a ‘night terror’, try to write it down, then go and have something warm to drink, watch some TV, listen to music or do something else that you find relaxing. It’s often best not to try and sleep until you have been able to relax for a while. Keep a list of people you can contact in the event of experiencing a flashback.
It may be useful to write the flashback down or tell it to someone you trust - though it can be very painful to speak about, talking it over with someone can help your healing. If you self-harm/injure in response to a flashback try to take some precautions to minimise the longer term harm that you might do to yourself. It may be useful to try and identify if there is anything in particular that triggers your flashbacks. It may be useful in the short-term to avoid your triggers, although you can’t always control when they occur. If you start experiencing a flashback while having sex with your partner you can stop and take time to relax. It’s OK to take time out from the sexual side of your relationship to work through these memories if you need to. Your partner should respect your choice and support you. Do something that helps you relax, e.g. have a bath, listen to your favourite music after you have had a flashback.
Remember flashbacks are a normal response to what you have experienced.
Survivors and self-harm/self-injury
Myths about self-harm
Self-injury is a failed suicide attempt
It is a way of coping with life, not a bid to die. Injuries are seldom life threatening. A survivor may want to kill their feelings - not themself.
It’s attention seeking, ignore it
Everyone needs attention. For some, self-injury is a desperate physical attempt to draw attention to the mental and emotional pain they are suffering. This should not be ignored, it is important to give attention and listen to what the survivor has to say.
On the other hand many people who self-injure hide their injuries from others. It has far more to do with coping than seeking attention.
The attention that self-injury receives is likely to be negative. Seldom does it lead to helping a survivor feel better about herself or relieving the distress that it caused.
Self-injury is a sign of insanity
This is not true. It is a sign of distress and of someone trying to cope with their life, despite great pain. Many survivors, who self-injure lead successful lives, have careers, partners, family and friends.
Someone who self-injures is a danger to others.
Self-injury is often very private and not openly discussed due to the negative response it receives. Someone who self-harms is no more likely to be a danger to others as anyone else.
Minimising the harm
Avoid drugs and/or alcohol if you think you are likely to self-harm, so you don’t accidentally inflict a more severe wound than you intended. Prevent infection by using something clean when you cut. Never share what you use to self-injure. Try to avoid areas where there are major veins and arteries close to the surface. Make sure your tetanus jabs are up to date.
Put burns under cold water for twenty to thirty minutes. Burns and scalds can be more severe than you think - the pain can be far worse later. Cling film, loosely covering the burn, can act as a temporary dressing. You can buy creams, sprays etc. for burns from your chemist.
Be prepared. Have dressings and antiseptics ready so you can care for your injuries. You can learn more about looking after wounds, cuts, burns etc. from a first aid book, someone you trust who knows about first aid or perhaps the nurse in your doctor’s practice.
Call an ambulance if blood is spurting from a wound. Wrap the injury in a clean towel or tea towel and try and stay calm. Clean any cuts with gauze swabs, not cotton wool. Cover with a dry, non-adhesive dressing. It can be useful to keep antiseptic creams, sprays etc. handy. Paper stitches can be used to close superficial wounds.
Seeking medical advice
Severe injuries. If any of your cuts are gaping and deep you will need medical attention. Try to keep the injured part raised and apply pressure until you get to hospital, to reduce the bleeding. You should also seek medical attention for burns larger than a fifty pence piece, or that have penetrated deep into the skin.
Infection. If cuts or burns become infected it is important to get medical treatment or you may become seriously ill.
Shock can occur if you lose a lot of blood (i.e. spurting or blood running continuously) or if you have severe or large burns. Call an ambulance if this happens.
Poisoning. If you drink bleach or any other corrosive liquid you can be in danger of poisoning. In these circumstances you must get medical advice or attention immediately.
Overdoses. If you think you may have taken too many drugs (prescribed or illegal) it is important to get medical help quickly, particularly with drugs such as paracetamol.
Remember you are not alone - there are many survivors who use self-harm as a way of coping.
For more information on coping with self-harm visit our Help Centre.
